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Blew My Chance

Learn To Approach Question: I really like this girl and I think that she likes me. Every time I see her I become nervous and don’t know what to say, though she is a few years older than me she always goes out of her way to make conversation with me. Three months ago she asked me out but I said I couldn’t go because I had plans. I didn’t really have plans just I like her so much I didn’t want to ruin it by going on a date with her and mess everything up. How can I get her interested in me again? Rowan Sydney
My Thoughts: Hey Rowan, thanks for your email and I agree it does sound like you’re in a bit of a pickle. The only thing that women hate more than turning out to a formal engagement only to find out another girl has the exact same outfit on is her is being rejected by a guy. Now if she asked you out and you said no you basically rejected her, and now you’re going to have your work cut out for you.
Believe it or not it’s okay to be a little bit nervous around a girl you like, if you ever get an opportunity to talk to a guy who is fantastic with women he will tell you that he gets nervous when he sees a beautiful woman as well. The difference between him and you is he lets his nerves work for him while you let your nerves work against you.
You said that you didn’t want to go out with her because she didn’t want to ruin it, I have to ask what do you think you’re going to ruin? Remember it was her last you out not the other way around. I would think that by rejecting her you would’ve done more damage to your chances with her than going on a date and as you say mess everything up.
The best advice I can give you is if she is still single you better have a good explanation why you rejected her. In this case I would tell her exactly what you told me and hope that she gives you a sympathy date. If she agrees to go out with you don’t stress about messing the night out just be yourself and go with the flow. Let me know how you get on.
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